Ricky Gervais in an 80's band?

Click here if you would like to see Ricky Gervais in an 80's band called, "Seona Dancing". For all of you who aren't familar with Ricky Gervais, he wrote and starred in the British version of "The Office".

A picture of my parents and I when I was little. We all really loved Bon-Jovi

Funny Pictures

Pinky

This is so cute. Awww, I love when cats go wild. Actually, I just love this guys reaction.

R.I.P Max 1978-2006

Over the Thanksgiving weekend my dog died. It was very sad. I went to Philadelphia with my parents for Thanksgiving and we housed Max at the Burnt Hills Vet. We came back on Sunday night and my father was going to pick him up the next day. That night the vet called and said that Max was having seizures and they didn't think he would make it through the night and they recommended he be put down. My mother hesitated but agreed. I think that if he hadn't gone to the vet he would be still alive. Sure he was deaf, blind and senile but he knew our house and it was probably to much of a shock for him to be somewhere else. Maybe the house kept him alive somehow. Even though he was old and gross I will miss him. It just seems like another thing in my life that is gone. RIP Max-you will be missed.

I laughed so hard I almost peed my pants and if peeing in your pants is cool consider me Miles Davis

This is so disturbing yet hilarious!

Britney Spears is nasty!

Click here to see what I mean.

Now I want to try Absinthe!

I never feel good. I started to read up on why a person would never feel good on the internet. I learned that everyone has tons of parasites in their system and this can lead them to feel run down and sick. I say to my mother that I think I have a parasite. She has been seeing a nutrionist who also feels that everyone has parasites. She gives me Wormwood pills to take. She also gives me pumpkin seeds which are supposed to be good to get rid of parasites. So, I'm looking up Wormwood on the internet and learn that it's a toxic plant that the illegal liqour, Absinthe is made from. It's legal in Portugal. I wish I had tried it when I was there. Well, I guess I will see if it will make me feel better. Probably not, I never feel well.

After the perverted things I put on yesterday, here's some cute baby animals.

OH YES, these are the lyrics to an actual rap song from the early 90's by a member of NWA. WARNING-This is some really sick stuff!

MC Ren Behind The Scenes lyrics

Behind the ScenesNow this is the bitch who made straight A's,but never got a look out of the house back in de dayzand when she was at school she gave people dirty looks,she always carried books and thought me and my friends were crooks,you always see the bitch in her classes,she never wore pants she wore a dress and some glasses,teachers used to brag, she was the teacher's pet,and the nigguz used to brag how much they wanna get her wet,usless to aproach her coz she didn't talk,but you would say fuck it when you saw the bitch walk,ass hanging out by the pound,and that's the reason why niggaz wanted to get her panties down,she kept to herself in the hallways,and never looked at niggaz like all day,and when the last bell rung she was gone,so one day I decided to follow the bitch home,her mother was at work she would'nt get home 'till 6,so it was time for ren to put the bitch in the mix, cuz back in the school it was every nigguz dream,so now it's time to get a closer look behind the scene!all the pimps, the hores, the pulldaggers, the cocksuckers,gave 100$ bill just to seenow I made it to her house but she would'nt let me in yo,so I said fuck it, snuck around to the window,she get into the room and start to undress,now I'm biting on my lips saying damn this bitch is blessed!the doorbell rung, it was the nextdoor neighbor,and he was asking her, could she do him a favour,she grabbed de nigga's hand and took him in the room,and layed on the back as he fucked her with a broom, he said he wanted to go but then she said,she wanted him to eat the pussy so she grabbed his head,and he started eating it like a thanksgiving dinner,he made the bitch come and then he put his dick up in her,she scratched up his back with her claws,but she was screaming so loud he had to gag her with his draws,and after they finished fucking yo the bitch took a shower,to wash off the sweat from the last half hour,the bitch put out some bud and then she started to smoke,took a swig of Jack Daniels and made a few lines of coke,the nigga said shit, gotta go,bcuz this innocent little girl is a ho!YO BEHIND THE SCENES!nobody in .. my neighborhood MiXnow I went back to school the very next day,and I knew that my niggaz won't believe what I had to say,I told them what I saw and nigguz said yeah right,so I told the mothafuckaz to come over there tongiht,now there's 10 real niggaz at her window,waiting to see a ho like at a matinee show they thought that I was lying cuz we waited 1 hour,and when we started to leave the bitch walked out da shower,ass hanging out as she laid on the bed,her bottomlips was hanging and she started fingerbanging,her daddy walked in and started beating her with a belt,the bitch was so hot she made the leather start to melt,but she was liking it,yelling daddy give it to me harder,then he took off all his clothes and start fucking his daughter,my niggaz outside did'nt believe what they would see-some,and when her mama got home, they turned into a threesome,her mama ate the pussy while her daddy doggystyled it,the family prayed together and they also laid together,I could'nt take no more cuz I was too much of a man,so I jumped right thru the window with my dick in my hand,The family didn't mind and kept doing what they was doing,cuz now it was even it was 2 against 2,and 'bout a couple minutes after I was in,all my niggaz jumped in all 10 yo behind the scenes!This is a bitch who did the whole crewyes daddy I love youShe like suckin' on dicks .. and lickin' up nut....and she'll even take a broomstick up the butt!

Sexual Dictionary

tt [adjective]: Extremely dominant 'How will you be defined in the sexual dictionary?' at QuizUniverse.com

DURAN DURAN

Yes, that's right, I'm going to be seeing Duran Duran for the second time at the Palace Theater in Albany. I'm going with my friend Jill, who is also a big dork. I know I'm a little bit young to be a Duran Duran fan(most are now in their 40's) but I have liked them for probably about 13 years. I have all their CD's minus their new ones(they just aren't very good) and I even have a VHS video of them. Sure, Duran Duran may not have meaning or substance to any of their songs but they were fun. Tickets were ridiculously expensive. They were $68 each! They went on sale at 10 am and I know someone who tired to get tickets and 10:18 am and they were sold out!! Pretty good for an old washed up 80's band. Here is an un-edited video for "Girls on Film". WARNING! Contains nudity.

I want to hibernate for the winter.

I really would like to hibernate for about 6 months. I need some peace of mind and rest. Induce a coma(but make sure I don't get brain damage) and let me sleep. I am not looking forward to the holidays. Due to events that have happened over the past couple of years, holidays are just depressing. Speaking of depressing, I was driving home last night and saw a dead cat in the road. I cried and felt sick. On my way to work this morning, the cat was still there, causing me to be sick again. That was someone's pet and they just leave it in the road like a dead squirrel or something. People wouldn't leave a dead dog in the road, why a cat? On my way home from work today it was gone. Maybe the poor owners were looking for their cat and saw it smushed in the road.
I really hate winter. My body is not conditioned for the cold. I know I've lived in the northeast my whole life but I really hate cold and snow! I'm not looking forward to snow. I get very scared driving in it. Especially since I have two completely, dangerously bald tires now. Oh well, here's a picture of a one eyed cat and the video of the Smiths, "Girlfriend in a Coma".

Okay Mr. Penguin. I'm gonna take you to the zoo where you'll meet some nice people, they'll treat you real respectable like.

Just like Billy Madison, I was drunk and seeing penguins. This was the point of the night where you say to yourself, I'm drunk, what the fuck am I doing, and I just need to go to sleep. I don't really remember what was said to the penguin but a guy dressed as a penguin playing pool is pretty funny. Also, making this picture look like a cartoon is pretty funny. I'm getting old. I really don't enjoy going out. I don't know if it's because I'm severely depressed or I'm just anti-social. I'd rather drink alone, watch tv and pass out so to have a short time of peace for my mind. But, I guess if I didn't get out once in a while I wouldn't see a penguin playing pool or be able to make a drunk fool of myself.

1997 was a long time ago.

My brother's friend John(seen here in the middle) sent me this picutre. My brother is on the left. He had just turned 16 in this picture. I had just graduated high school and was on my way to college. I can't believe how long ago that was and how much horrible stuff has happened since. I miss my brother. I miss the innocence I had in 1997. I miss a lot of things that i can't do anything about. Sometimes life sucks. Actually, most of the time it sucks. I can't change it or fix it and that is the most frustrating thing.

My Celebrity Look-alikes

Could this be the oldest living dog?

When people see my dog, Max, they just laugh. He's hardly a dog. My brother likes to say that he died 6 years ago and he is filled with spiders that make him move(my brother is sort of weird). My father found Max in 1995 by the railroad tracks. When we got him he was estimated to be around 9-10 making him over 20 years old now!! He has one tooth and is blind and deaf. He also likes to eat my cat's food. I don't even like to touch him because he makes me break out in hives, probably becasue of his old fur. Maybe I could make money off of him? Actually I looked it up and Max has a long way to go to be crowned, "The oldest living dog" .

Neil Patrick Harris-a great comedic actor!

Who knew Doogie Houser was so funny. I just started to recently watch, "How I Met Your Mother" and really NPH is the only reason I watch it. He was also great in the movie, "Harold and Kumar go to White Castle". Just listening to NPH saying he's tripping balls and wants to go get pussy is priceless!

Hinder- the new Nickelback?

When I first heard this song I thought it was Nickelback. This has to be one of the most shitty, horrible peices of shit I've ever heard. My ears bleed when I hear it. The guys voice sounds like he is taking a dump and the video proves that he looks even more douche bagish than he sounds. Actually, this is worse than Nickelback-there I said it. I can't wait for their next single-"Get Stoned". I'm sure it will be quality like "Lips of an Angel".